The coven:
13 blogs we may look at when not lost in admiration of our own:

Vacant slot
HMRC is shite
News Bleat
Nobody′s Friend
the freethinker
Vacant slot
National Secular Society
Vacant slot
Vacant slot
Vacant slot
Vacant slot
Vacant slot
Vacant slot
Yeh! Most of em died!
Islam totally sucks links:
Gates Of Vienna
Jihad Watch
Last commenty thing that we could be bothered to create. (Lazy old git)
This page 3 Rs rating:
Rude: 0.00
Rant: 14.12
Rubbish: 42.35
Other: 43.53
Threat level: LOW
Links to items
Scumbag Police


Wierd Perves

YouTube up yer bum

Quantum Theory TV Remote needed

Spending our money

Fucking parasitic people


The Autumn Budget

Gin-Clod Junkheap



Jimmy Zombie

You want a grasp of reality at the moment? Ask the "far right"

A solution to global warming

Page 57 (Latest)

The ramblings of an old git

bloggoth Mission Statement:

          We aim to never raise our sights above the gutter and preferably to stay much lower


Animals rely on their natural senses, sight, hearing, smell and feeling, to survive. Some birds even use the Earth's magnetic field to navigate. These abilities have evolved over hundreds of millions of years.

Assuming mankind has not wiped them all out, some may evolve over the next milion years or so to use all those energy forms man generates - satellite signals, phone signals, WIFI etc. This would be great for all those migrating Wildebeests or Gnus in Africa if they could access live satellite images to see where there's still plenty of green growth.

Attibution. Modified section from
Haplochromis [GFDL (http://www.gnu.org/copyleft/fdl.html) or CC BY-SA 3.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0)], from Wikimedia Commons

Desirable disablities

There was a story in the BBC TV local news today about a youngish deaf chap who had had his hearing restored with digital hearing aids. He was so pleased he could hear his young son.

What? Squealing kids are a good reason to want to be deaf! Same with lefty twats, people going on about Brexit etc. Then there's things you may not want to see. Maybe you are afraid of spiders or don't want to look at ugly people like Juncker on TV. There may be events you don't want to go to, boring family dos perhaps, but you can't think of an excuse not to.

Maybe there's a way to link your brain reactions to your senses to give you an instant disability that allows you to avoid whatever you don't like but goes away again once the problem disappears. Kids squeal, you go deaf, ghastly people on TV, you go blind, boring things you don't want to go to, your legs are paralysed.

Torture me!

Not feeling as crap the past couple of months but still have little enthusiasm to get some things done. I have a reasonable social life and get out quite a bit but, apart from walking, I don't get round to doing something unless I am sorta forced into it, it's something Ive arranged to do with someone else. I used to like doing ME stuff, silly cartoons, daft stories etc.. A life that's just about going out and socialising is life outside yourself, if there's nothing inside, it's a hollow life.

Forced into it - hmm. Maybe that's what I really need (apart from vodka) to restore my enthusiasm for xoggoth stuff. Talking therapies, counselling - pointless probably. Torquemada! He was the sort of therapist I need!

Real life should do that

Try to find new places for walks and often use Google Street View to see if there's anywhere to park near footpaths of interest. Rather gloomy autumn day here. Now go forward and it's summer!

Missed me!

You read about these unfortunate accidents in the papers, somebody being hit by a falling wall, being on a balcony when it collapses etc. but you never think it could happen to you.

It ain't yet, but came close the other day. Was doing one of my volunteering things making a dead hedge in a local nature reserve. Heard a load bang and a tree came down nearby, right over the footpath I'd walked along less than 5 minutes before.

What a shame we can't control these chance events - trees should always fall on ghastly people like Ken Clarke or Juncker or Tony Blair.

At least fake news is free

Obviously ads don't do it anymore. More and more of the online newspapers, the more serious ones anyway, are turning towards subscription only. The Times went that way years ago, The Daily Telegraph over a year ago and now The Independent is asking for contributions.

Trouble is, this may result in a narrowing of focus. Although we at bloggoth consider ourselves a righty on some issues we also browse the more left wing papers and sometimes they do make valid points. We are also a meany and certainly won't be subscribing to them all if they all require payment so it will probably just be the DT. Swing right! Or maybe we will give up on them all. Most of their "news" is not based on verified facts and statistics, it's selective reporting that suits their particular bias. How can The Telegraph and The Guardian both be right on Brexit? It's impossible!

Why do we need them anyway when we can read "fake" news for free? It's probably at least as accurate as anything the major papers peddle. Let's broaden our minds by looking at other sources of news, dig up whatever we can find on the net. Ah yes! The EU is ruled by giant lizards. I find that rather believable when I look at Juncker. Think he's just about to shed his skin!

Image attributes:
https://www.flickr.com/photos/eppofficial/ [CC BY 2.0 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons

PS The idea has already been proven 100% about Merkel!

Why are horror films such bollux these days?

Started watching some crap film, supposedly a supernatural thriller. After about 15 mins of some geeky sort wandering around setting up CCTVs while talking to himself and telling a surly bloke to put his head cam on I gave up. Mind you, it wasn't as bad as another I tried to watch recently, about a vengeful god who sends angels to destroy mankind. The first angel turns up - in an ice cream van! Then the others come, driving cars across the desert. FFS! Surely a vengeful god could do better than that!

Still, if that's the standard of horror films these days, maybe I could get out my cheap camera and make my own movie. I could earn a fortune! My little puppet parrot could play the evil villain with a dastardly plan to entrap the whole of humanity in my garden shed. He is finally thwarted by next door's cat who removes a screw from the diabolical world-enslaving device made from old bits and pieces I keep there.


The secret of St Hillary's

Religion - can we switch?

There are so many religions in the world and so many different divisions within these religions. You'd think a real god would make a better job of informing us what his true message was. The variety of religions is one of the best proofs that it's all bollux. Still, even one of such supreme intelligence as we at xoggoth could be wrong, one can never totally prove/disprove anything.

Who knows? Maybe ALL these gods exist. In which case how can we decide which offers the best afterlife? I quite like Islam's offer of 72 virgins, assuming the resurrected me has his necessary functions fully restored, but do I want to be a miserable vodka-free git in this life? Not sure about Hinduism and Buddhism. Do I really want to be reincarnated and have to pay for all the cockups I made in this life? On the other hand, at least I get another chance, unlike with Christianity where I could burn for all eternity. Judaism is a bit better in that there is no permanent hell, but everyone gets stuck in a dark lifeless place for a year to learn the errors of their ways. Then there's all the old religions, Greek for example. As I don't blog in Greek, the gods may not recognise and reward my genius with a place in Elysium and I could end up in the crappy Asphodel fields with crappy ordinary people. If I was a Satanist, I might get to fulfil my lifelong dream of kissing a goat's arse but the downside is that Satanism offers no afterlife - when you're dead, you're dead.

It's very difficult to decide. What we need is a comparison website, similar to Go Compare or uswitch. Surely making a choice regarding one's future afterlife is a bloody sight more important than deciding on insurance or energy suppliers?

Never too far back!

Political correctness is driving sane people mad. Objecting to intentional racism, sexism, whatever, is fair enough but it's just gone totallly over the top. What is really daft is judging people in history by today's standards. Nelson, Churchill, Kipling, are among many we should stop honouring due to their supposed attitudes. It would be different if they were mainly famous for being racists or supporters of slavery etc. but they are not. They are rightly honoured for what they did, defending our nation, writing some darn good fiction, or whatever.

Trouble is, there seems to be no time limit on this idiocy. Students have even demanded that philosophers such as Plato and Kant are removed from the syllabus because they were white. Makes you wonder how much further this will go. Dippy the Dinosaur is currently on tour round the UK. Let's hope they don't discover something about him.

Peace and love! Sorted! War ends!

Lots of events commemorating the end of WW1 in the last few weeks. It was suggested as a subject for our art group, so knocked up a crappy cartoon.

Lefty twats

Some immigration rules do need revision, it seems daft to me that a competent doctor who has worked here for 16 years should be removed from the UK because of a marriage breakup. Is it really so difficult to take account of someone's value? On the other hand, no system will be perfect. We cannot use errors, as some lefties love to argue, for a blanket relaxing of immigration rules.

It would be great if we could never have tensions, but I loathe the tendency of some lefty liberals who seem to think that all the problems of humanity can be sorted by running around holding up placards while ignoring the real causes of them. The growth of the "Far right" in Europe is a reaction to real problems caused by mass immigration with inadequate checks that has given us huge problems, including a growth in organised crime and terrorism. Marching about shouting "No to racism" will solve nothing, the real solution is to have far more rigorous checks that ensure we only have the people who benefit our nation.

PS One of the daftest lefty articles in recent months is on the Independent

Strict government controls on immigration drive up the number of people entering a country illegally, a new study has found. While visa restrictions cut overall migration, academics said they can be "ineffective and counterproductive" because they force more people to find unlawful ways to cross borders. ... The findings are likely to be seized on by campaigners demanding the government relax its immigration rules.

Ah yes! That wouldn't result in much higher numbers of immigrants would it? To prevent illegal migrants just wave them in legally! Sorted! Why doesn't the government apply this sensible solution to all crime! Gang killings in London? Just make stabbling and shooting people legal, then all these useless gang members will be law-abiding members of society!

PPS. Another bit in that sensible article:

The study found that restrictions on low-skilled and family migration cut total immigration by 21 per cent and 32 per cent respectively but also drove up illegal immigration by 14 per cent and 24 per cent respectively.

Ah yes! Let's politely gnore the fact that the percentage cut in total migration is still around 50% higher than the rise in illegal migration and ask the question that should be obvious to any but a total idiot. Per cent of what? Illegal migration, including overstayers etc, is probably around a third of total migration. Basic maths seems to be a problem for liberal lefties, so often they trot out figures showing the net benefit of immigrants but not mentioning that it's a much smaller figure then the increase in population.


Not sure about all this Phillip Green stuff as these issues have so many problems. Is it reasonable that the subject of serious allegations should be revealed before there is any actual conviction, given the enormous damage done to someone who may turn out to be innocent? On the other hand, not revealing his name is damaging to others who fit the general description.

I know what would be a bloody good idea though. Why can't we buy tickets to be members of the house of Lords for one hour? Then we could go and make all sorts of allegation against people we don't like, knowing we can't be sued. Let's see, 8hhrk7Y?0£@, he's a kiddy fiddler, X&hhw89k3k#, she's a serial fraudster, q'Yu37/s$fO3, he bonks pidgeons.

A small charge of £50 is required for sofware to decode the above and reveal the true identities.

WTF? Going backwards!

Some good news today, Irish voters have overwhelmingly supported the proposal to remove the prohibition on blasphemy from the Constitution. I don't suppose we'll ever have a rational world free from the unsubstantiated bollux of religious dogma but this is a welcome step in the right direction.

Now the bad news. The European Court of Human Rights has upheld the convition of a woman for insulting religion after she called the Prophet Mohammed a paedophile. WTF?? If she had been deliberately inciting hatred of Muslims that would be a different matter but she wasn't. She was attacking the basis of a religion by suggesting that Muhammad was, like all so-called prophets and messiahs, just another ordiinary flawed man. How can we have any argument on a religion if everyone is supposed to treat the founders of it with the same respect as its followers?

Thanks a lot f* EHCR. The Irish intend to take Europe forward by rescinding prosecution for blasphemy laws and you have just taken us all backwards by effectively reimposing them.

PS What's the betting, if someone had made similar allegations against Ron Hubbard or Jesus, that would be considered of no consquence?

Topic: WTF? Going backwards!       Comment here.       Comments so far: 0

Why is the public sector so crap?

Had a letter from the council a few weeks back saying that, due to increased demand, we should put both waste and recycling bins out every third week starting on 4th October. But when I checked online using the address on the letter I found no mention of this change. So which is right, the website or the letter?

So Fucking typical really. Do a few volunteer things including footpath/repairs inspections and police search and get various emails from public authorities. Often an email is followed by another apologising for errors in the first one, that have been brought to their attention. Think all public sector jobs should be outsourced to hamsters. They'd be much more efficient.

Brain test

We forget things as we get older. Lying awake last night, I was trying to remember various things from Greek mythology. Managed a few. There was Herpes, the Greek God of thingy, Gonorrhea the wife of some god, the hero Siphilis and sea nymph Chlamydia.

Reassuring that I did quite well.

Farty Arty

Suggested subject for today's art group was Quentin Blake, famous cartoonist who illustrated books by Roald Dahl, including Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Of course I did not do an exact copy of Blake's stuff as others did, I do not copy from works that are inferior to my own, but style is similar.

PS Line down the middle is due to sticking scanned A4 parts together. Shoulda kept the missus's A3 printer.


The end of rubbish

PS Yank geniuses with an interest in Zero Point/Dark Energy etc. are not permitted to point out the numerous flaws in the above. It is a story for us idiots whose knowledge of such things comes from science fiction movies.

Good news

Links from lefty Mirror and righty Mail just for political balance:

  1. Human race faces extinction if male sperm count continues to fall worldwide
  2. Spermageddon: Fresh fears over survival of humans as major study finds quality of men’s sperm is plunging due to pollution and junk food

Sounds great, reduction of population is exactly what we need! All the global warming, pollution, habitat destruction, wildife extinctions - the basic cause is too many people. Most of them are crap anyway.

PS I prefer the DM headline Spermageddon, reminds me of one of those cheap horror films. After undergoing radiotherapy on his prostate, a man wakes up to find that Megasperm has swallowed his wife!

Where to next?

Mr Sheep's FAG school post has a link to a website of a British School where they teach PHSE - all the modern crap about equality, diversity etc. Little kids who can barely write are writing essays like "Is it ok to be gay?"

I'm all for equality and freedom of choice but this whole LGBT equality thing seems to have gone beyond common sense in that children who are way too young to be interested in sex are being taught all this gender awareness stuff. When we are little kids we are just ourselves, these issues are irrelevant. I wonder whether it may actually be harmful in that children might start worrying about things they don't need to worry about for some years. If you are seen by other kids as bit of a cissie or a tomboy, you may start thinking that you have a real problem to face up to. Quite unjustifiably in most cases, a girl who likes playing cowboys and indians is not necessarily going to turn out to be lesbian or a woman who yearns to be a man.

One wonders how far all this crap will go?

PS I recall, when I was probably 12 or so, having these recurring fantasies about this girl who kept me imprisoned in a cage. She used to feed me as though I was a hamster or something. It did not seem to spill over into my sexual tendencies, never been into bondage or stuff like that.

Eeeeh 2 (or is 3, 4, or 200? Forgotten

Spent couple hours in bed as so tired. Then Mrs Drinky called, so went next door. Mr PS turned up and spent a while talking about really important stuff, like positive displacement pumps. He's had an interesting career working on sewage farms! I spent time working on oil refineries but , when it come to the technologies involved, there is not a lot of difference. Everything is shit when you view it dispassionately. Hate to say it but, when one does not have a conflict with the bloke, he's a nice, interesting chap.

Of course, three gins helps to create a posiitve assessment on anything. Gordon Bennet! GIn seems a lot stronger than vodka!


Waddya do now? Lost it in the last few years.

By it, I mean interest in anything. Now the winter is coming and I can't spend my time messing about doing pointless things in the garden, I am not sure what to do with much of my spare time. Sure, I do various social or volunteer things, I am not a recluse. Got art group today, was at Mrs Drinky's soixante-neuf birthday party yesterday - me and Mr PS are talking again, went wandering with my usual loony lady day before, did writer's group previous day etc. etc.

All very well, but it's always been the free me time that used to matter most. Had various obsessions that filled my waking hours my whole life, microscopy, electronics projects, blogging, cartoons and wierd artwork, writing silly stories, reading, DIY projects, playing guitar (or attempting to) ... *Note. Now, just seem to have lost interest in everything. Have to force myself to do things.

Hmmm. Oh well, perhaps this is good preparation for what is to come. Sitting in an armchair at some old people's home, watching TV all day, when I'm not having a pee. Actually might be quite fun.

Note: And trying to persuade the late missus to take it up the arse obviously. Never succeeded

An unusual consistency of loathsomeness

The liberal lefties who claim to oppose "bigotry" are often in denial of some real problems. On the other hand, even when real problems exist, the views of the real far right, as opposed to the "far right", ie those who don't live in a PC dream world, are equally as nutty. No matter how widespread a problem may be in a group, whether defined by religion, race, politics or whatever, it generally does not apply to all in the group.

There seems to be one exception - NUNS! My personal experience of these awful women, mercifully a short one when I stayed with an aunt when my mother was ill and got sent to a Catholic primary school, was awful. Vicious, bad tempered women who shouted at and slippered us little kids at every opportunity. Not just my experience, everyone I have ever met who has been at a school run by nuns has told the same stories of unecessary cruelty.Talking to another two just last Friday. Another yesterday. Try a simple Google of "nuns ireland" and see the scale of some other abuses. Just one typical pretty one here

"They were called the Sisters of Mercy, but for what they did to poor unfortunate children in the orphanage, they were Sisters without any Mercy, she said. "



Creative heaven

HMRC are vampires

Spent umpteen hours over the last two weeks doing company accounts due to looming deadlines for Companies house and CT. Takes an eternity due to huge complexity, we take online orders and have 6 accounts - bank, cash, Paypal, Worldpay, Google, Amazon, which I have to reconcile with my sister's F* awful book keeping, There's all sort of stuff she never bothers to put into the accounts sheets, I have to send her great lists of things in the bank reports and ask what they are, and some of them are nothing to do with the company!

Mind you, it's not all my F* sister's fault. Why do accounts and CT submissions need to be so F* complex for a tiny company that has a turnover of about £15k and a profit of less than £1000? Why do we need to bother with debtors, outstanding payments, creditors, bad debts, the complex treatment of stock and breaking of down expenses into various categories? Why can't we just put two figures? 1) Amount paid to directors and 2) Net receipts into bank accounts. All the debts, write off etc. all even out sooner or later. As for stock valuation, we can deal with that when the company is wound up.

Everything that governments do are too F* complex. They just exist to annoy us. They are so f* stupid! Parasites! Leeches!


People love to comment on incidents in the news as if they were experts with amazing insight. They just read a couple of paragraphs and they can decide whether the defendant was guilty, whether it was a terrorist incident or what the sentence should be. What would the police who have extensively examined the facts, or juries who have spent days, weeks or months hearing the evidence, know about it?

Of course even juries are not as well suited to make judgements as xoggoth. Rolph Harris? We like old Rolphy, so he was innocent of all charges! Transfer the charges to some ghastly lefty person - Vince Cable, he'll do! Hang 'im.

Demons under the bed

Grabbed a couple of boxes of old horror stories on Freecycle a couple of days ago. Brill! The old ones were the best, modern horror, like nearly everything modern, (yeh, I'm a fossilised old fart!) are boring crap.

Bunged the boxes under my bed and my loony lady friend said it was a bad idea due to the "negative vibrations". Feng Shui is mostly nonsense in my opinion. It is logical enough to think that appearance of things can affect our mood or that movement, sounds, smells or light can affect our sleep, but some old horror books in plastic cases? Bollox! What can they possibly emit that could affect us?

Hmmmm. Dunno though. She's got me worried now. Is it possible that all those fictional ghosts, monsters, demons, zombies etc. could slip out from between the pages and start infesting my bedroom?

Or maybe the ghost of the previous owner? The lady who gave them to me said they belonged to her late mother who was an avid horror fan. She also said that a number of people wanted them but she chose me because her Irish mother would have preferred they went to someone of Irish ancestry, presumably she inferred mine from my email.


Whatever happened to them? It isn't just this site that is a desert, very few get many visitors these days, hardly suprising few bother with them much anymore. It's the same with once popular forums like Contractor UK, even the more "popular" posts go for hours between comments.

I suppose it's because all this Facebook, Instagram and Twitter crap have taken over. Once people posted longish articles now it's just a couple of sentences or a picture with a caption. Whereas we used to have proper arguments now it's just abuse.

Makes you wonder where the world is going.

Me wall, cats and stuff

Coming on very slowly as having enormous trouble getting the bits and, mainly of course, I can't be arsed with it. Still, have to say it looks a lot nicer with son's GF's cat sitting on the pillar. Can't expect it to sit there forever but maybe when it snuffs it, the GF wil let me stuff it and cover it with some waterproof varnish.

Not out of keeping with my macabre nature, got a collection of deer and sheep skulls down the garden. Things like that are quite decorative, it is a shame they don't put bones of famous people up for auction. It would amuse me up no end to sit on my patio with a vodka and sneer at Ken Clarke's skull on my wall pillar.

Preparing for xoggoth world dictatorship

Often when I go walking in country places there are benches with memorials on, eg: "Dedicated to Henry Whatsisname who loved walking in this place" Nice to be remembered! When I get to be world dictator I am going to make it the law that every single place I have ever been to in my life has a plaque dedicated to the fantastic xoggoth!

Far too many places in the world I haven't been to, of course so that won't be enough. I shall also make sure that every person in the world is reminded of the great xoggoth on a daily basis!

We much prefer nice little animals to crappy people but even other life forms won't be allowed to do what they like without the say so of xoggoth!

I wanna be rich!

Started building a wall between my new oil tank and my bin store new to conform to all the F* fire regulations. Looks crap at mo but think it will be ok when I've finished it.

Went for a walk today down a private road to a nice little Woodland Trust woodland near me and a householder was in process of having a new wall done. Bit more expensive than mine I reckon!

Rarely seen anywhere where the houses are quite so posh! The next picture just shows an average one . Many are barely visible or invisible as they are down long private tracks or have huge wooded gardens Some of them have granny annexes that are bigger than my house!

The most fantastic thing is that the whole road is nestled in hundeds of acres of gorgeous woodland. Don't think I'll ever afford to live there even in one of the smallest places but if I win the lottery (sod, missed it by 45mins again!) that's where I want to go!

PS Hang on though. Saw this at the roadside. Maybe I could afford that!

Oh Marina. Have I finally cracked it this time?

Thought I'd found the solution to being tired/depressed most of the time once before when I started taking some iron tablets. The improvement lasted all of 3 days. Feeling better for about three weeks now, so maybe I have finally cracked it this time. The problem may have been that occasional fag with Mrs Drinky! All the time I felt so crappy mentally I also had problems with constant catarrh and rhinitis that was always much worse when I got up in the morning. I knew it wasn't hay fever as it had no correlation to time of the year.

Wise Google said it can be an allergic reaction to various substances, including occasional cigarette smoke. In turn, allergic reactions can affect the quality of sleep which obviously can cause fatigue, which in turn causes depression.

I am always wary of publicly (ha ha) saying such things in case the Great God Sod wants to make me look an idiot again. We shall see.

PS Only the UK visitors will understand the Marina bit. Old episodes of Last of the Summer Wine are about the only thing worth watching on TV these days. Why do most of them run away from her? Wish I was being pursued by a randy lady like that!

Fucking government/EU rules

I need a 1.5m concrete fence post to stick up my bum to shield my new oil tank while complying with all the FUCKING new safety rules. Easier said than done. Thanks to GDPR EU crap you have to go through a FUCKING popup about cookies/privacy etc. when you visit any website now. There are some crappy websites around with serious errors, one for a major company I just visited gives a not found messages when I try and click on the pdf catalog link. Doesn't stop them finding time to add a whole load of bollux about privacy and security.

But maybe I'm being unfair to the wonderful EU, perhaps they know what they are doing. After all, what could possibly be more effective at increasing our internet security than ensuring that people give up visiting websites altogether!

Quick crap

Only had about 20 mins, minus chatting/coffee slurping time, at art group yesterday due to another engagement so did a quick cartoon of a lady there who flogs us eggs.


The Reunion

Ah get on with it!

Must get back to farting around on this load of crap that almost nobody ever reads.

Need to escape from the cats anyway. Son's GF has moved in with two of the little buggers. Well behaved as cats go, no crap on the sofa yet, but not sure I want miouwing outside my bedroom door first thing in the morning Made the mistake of letting it in once to stop it scratching the carpet, thinking it wanted to sit on the windowsill as usual, but it came onto my bed and starting nuzzling me and licking my face and rubbing itself all over me. Had it not been neutered I would have been afraid for my virginity!

Pity they can't make pets more useful, if they had little battery powered vaccuum cleaners stuck to their bellies, I wouldn't have to hoover.

Ex Crete

An appropriate title. Got back from holiday in Northern Crete a couple of days ago. What a shithole! Crowds of people, beaches covered in sunbeds, masses of shops and cafes, constant loud music. Ok, fairly typical S Europe holiday destination, I know. I don't mind that as long as I can leave the loony lady to it and escape into the country but in Crete all the nearest "country", if you can call grey scrubby crap covered in olive trees that, was fenced off and there were almost no footpaths. I shall certainly do a lot more research before booking the next holiday.

Makes you appreciate Britain's wonderful variety of scenery. We just need a greatly reduced population and it would be heaven. How do you bring back the black death?

Why is my "art" so sexually fluid?

I obviously have a bunch of poofy paintbrushes. At last art group session I was painting a young woman and it ended up looking like a bloke. Started painting an oldish man today and somehow it ended up looking like a woman. Too much eyelash, lips too red etc. In the end I decided to change it into a zombie. That's the good thing about zombies, they never look gay!

Hmm. Dunno though.


Haven't We Been here Before?

Bah! You LGBT lot have it easy

Us blokes who prefer to bonk woman, even when they're as handsome as xoggoth, usually have to work hard to get our way. Not too many women want to have sex straight away with every bloke they meet, we are expected to charm them, date them for weeks, take them out for expensive meals etc. etc before we stand a chance. Gay blokes, on the other hand, just have to go to a gay sauna or similar and bingo, arse all sorted!

Another problem for straight blokes is finding any clothes to wear. Went to two towns today looking for a few things for my holiday next week. Many clothes stores cater for women only. Those that cater for both sexes have umpteen aisles of lady's stuff and a little corner with men's stuff and they all sell exactly the same crap. Want a long-sleeved T shirt or an informal jacket that doesn't look like an anorak? No chance.

Before my next holiday I am definitely going to have a sex change operation and dose myself up on estrogen. Then I might have a bit more choice in my wardrobe.

Cor! Don't I look lovely!

Age and authors again

A few posts back I mentioned how a novel unrealistically described the feelings of a depressed bloke in poetic and lyrical fashion. Have been reading a much better book for the book club this time, Death's Disciple by James Whitworth, about a series of murders by somebody obsessed with Dracula, much more my kind of story. Whitworth also has a better grasp of how such people think:

And now I have nothing. No drive, no goals, nothing interests me. The only time I am ever animated is when I'm shouting at the television or complaining about some fool's driving.

Sounds so familiar! Not just me either. (Eh teeth?)

Life without broadband

A neighbour backed her car into the telegraph pole over the road and tore out our phone line, so without broadband for 6 days. Not into Facebook, Twitter and similar crap but still found it hard to live without the internet. I think I'll just check my emails, oh, hang on, not got internet! I want to print a map for my next walk, or I'm doing summit technical and need a bit of code, or want to look at the online news or a forum, or want to watch something on catchup TV, oh hang on, not got internet! Sod it!

Opened a browser and a router fault page came up with a link "try to fix the problem". I clicked on that but it didn't the pole back to the vertical or put new cables in! Crap software Microsoft!

PS SEXIST COMMENT: Yes! A woman driver!

Today's moans

Started watching a zombie film the other night but soon gave up as all the zombies looked far too fresh! I like my zombies rotted! If they ain't rotted they ain't true zombies!

Canned laughter! Don't you just hate it? You can be watching a sitcom in which the characters are outside or in a small car and yet this huge hidden audience is guffawing away at even the most unfunny predictable bits.

PS On the other hand, couldn't we be encouraged to conduct our lives better if everything we did was subject to scrutiny from a huge audience who would make their opinions known? It should be possible with modern technology, we just need to be mounted with miniature cameras, microphones, video screens and speakers. Everthing we said and did would be live streamed to the internet and those watching would be able to express their opinions on it.

Every solution has its problems

Brian is a keen DIY enthusiast but his little workshop has some issues....


Coming Back

PS And how come, given the relatively high percentage of people who snuff it sitting on the loo, there are no haunted bogs?

When did the UK become such a crappy straight laced place?

Just one example, a massage parlour that was stripped of its licence after being accused of offering "red light services"

WTF? It used to be the case that, unless it specifically excluded such things in its adverts, any bloke visiting a massage parlour would be offered "extras". The police knew and never did anything about it. At one time lots of people used to go to "dogging sites" too, now anywhere suitable for such things is monitored and any car parks are closed early.

The UK is turning into a f* nunnery!

Update: Maybe I spoke too soon on this one. Link here

Police are choosing to allow brothels to operate providing they create a safe environment for women, one former detective - now a brothel owner - has told the BBC's Victoria Derbyshire programme.

Democracy that suits them

The usual suspects keep calling for a public vote on the final Brexit deal between the UK and the European Union. Well, we do live in a democracy so I'm not against the idea, just as long as the question respects every citizens' rights to decide. This should be the question on the ballot paper:

Having considered the final deal between the UK and the EU do you wish to:
1 Accept the deal ?
2 Reject the deal and remain in the EU ?
3 Reject the deal and leave the EU?

What's that you say, pro-EU "democrats" ? You only want the first two questions? Well, there's a surprise!

A human's worth is subjective

Following a petition, a council has decided to create a safe buffer zone outside an abortion clinic to prevent women being harassed by religious nutcases. Excellent! Birth or abortion - it should be entirely a woman's decision. There is no soul. A foetus with little or no brain development is no more a human being than a slice of elbow.

Does a human life have any intrinsic value? Not in my opinion. Maybe there is a meaning to life in general, evolution is one observable thing that may suggest there is some grand purpose behind it all, but the lives of individual creatures start and end pretty much at random. Maybe they serve that grand purpose but their individual value is negligible, they are like pebbles in a stone wall. If there is a god, there is no evidence that he gives a shit about any of us personally.

Does human life have any value at all? Subjectively, of course it does, because we matter to ourselves and, by association, so do others who share and contribute to our happiness. "Do as you would be done by" pretty well sums it up, we don't need tens of thousands of pages of philosophy and we certainly don't need the bollux of holy scriptures. Who needs the ten commandments when we have the instincts and feelings that nature has given us? We already know that being robbed or hurt or cuckolded makes us unhappy.

The only meaningful measure of human value is what we contribute to life. Those whose net contribution is wholly negative have no value at all. Like that piece of shit burglar who got stabbed.

The better the author, the worse some books get

Was pursuaded pressured by a lady I know to join her book club. Big mistake really, who wants to read a book chosen by others? Book clubs are for ladies!

Hate this one, The Eyrie by Tim Winton. Not finished it yet but keep reading another chapter to see if it improves, it never does. So far, apart from recollections of past events in vague form, it's largely event free, it is all about the feelings of "a divorced, unemployed and disgraced" individual who drinks, takes pills and wanders about feeling sorry for himself.

Winton is not a crap author and that's the problem! He's very lyrical, the character's feelings and memories are expressed in great detail with no repetition and that's why it's so unrealistic! People who are depressed don't go around looking at the world, fantasising of what their life should be in imaginative and poetic terms! On the contrary, they are more likely to be devoid of imagination, to be uninterested in the outside world, to think the same repetitive and negative thoughts over and over. Imagination and perception are the prerogative of the normal.

Just looking at one page of my cheap old Kindle, this chap misses his father's gigantic presence, feels that he models himself on memory, no longer feels there is a grand striding towards justice and equality and is in a new managerial dispensation where change was incremental or purely notional, big gestures were extinct and, even on Youtube, messianic figures rose and evaporated in hours. Pardon? Say again?

Here's my more realistic book about the life and thoughts of a failure: "Right, another vodka. What do do? Fuck knows! Back to bed. Flick the news first. More crap. Who cares? What a load of shit. Fucking bastards! Bollox to the lot of 'em! Shoot em all! Maybe I should... Ah bollox! What's the point? Where's the vodka? Need a wank....." Continue in almost identical vein for another 200 pages.

Right, it's always our fault

Sure I'm not the only person to get pissed off with the PC slant on many issues.

Actually, it's worse than that, it's a sort of inverted racism. According to the PC dream world, migrants leave behind any cultural problems as soon as they cross the border. High crime, organised crime, corruption, low economic performance, beliefs and practices that are incompatible with Western laws and ideals, all gone. If they don't succeed it's down to our racism, every problem within an ethnic group is our fault. Why does forced marriage or FGM happen in the UK? According to the lefty press it's because we are not doing enough to tackle these issues. Any suggestion that stricter immigration controls could have avoided having these problems in the first place is deemed racist.

It's the same with the rise in violence in London, largely due to gang killings by black youths. It's because white affluent cocaine users are driving demand or because we not investing enough taxpayers' money to improve the prospects of black kids although, when you compare the amounts spent on schooling per pupil in high ethnic areas compared to the national average, that claim is dubious. They blame a policy of austerity meaning kids have less access to allowances, support service or benefits, but surely these cuts affect all of us? If this is all about racism and rejection by white society, how is it you don't get these gang problems among other ethnic groups? Muslims are hardly the most popular group at the moment and yet most South Asian Muslims live in stable families and many run their own businesses. If it's all about poverty, why are there no waves of gang killings in some other very deprived areas like Blackpool?

In 2016 there were 1616 murders in Jamaica. In the UK, with a population nearly 23 times as great, the figure for the same year was 571.

What has that got to do with anything, xoggoth??? Racist!

Let's celebrate somebody important

Went on my volunteer thing at a local nature reserve yesterday expecting to be doing some hard work, clearing and repairing footpaths, removing fallen tree from ponds etc. Unfortunately, the bloke in charge had not been able to contact the council to find what needed doing so we ended up just wandering about clearing litter, including bags of dog poo.

Lots of people get honoured for various things, like Martin Luther King who has been in the news recently on the aniversary of his death. Fair enough, but why haven't I been honoured for my major contributions to the environment? Surely clearing up other people's dog poo is up there with winning civil rights for black Americans? I certainly hope I will be recognised as being among the outstanding world figures when I snuff it.


The Bio Tattoo

Age - bloody hell!

The xoggoth 3r's (Rude, Rant and Rubbish) at left has a Rude content of 0%. A few years ago I would never have gone more than a few posts without fantasising about pervy sex. Now nowt!

F* 'ell! Doesn't that say it all about age! If you aren't obsessed with fat ladies' bumholes or bonking pigs, what's the point of going on?

Politics, AI and video games

Lots of violent video games out there, many seem to involve heros fighting off a zombie or alien invasion. Not into them myself but I might change my mind if there was a tech breakthrough that allowed me to superimpose faces of the people I loath onto those zombies or whatever.

If there was an easy way to change the video I could really enjoy shooting all those utter scumbags. Should be enough people I'd like to kill to mask an entire zombie invasion - Vince Cable, Ken Clarke, Jean-Claude Juncker, Michael O'Leary, Steve Coogan, Gina Miller, Gary Lineker, Richard Branson, Ken Loach, John Bercow, Lily Allen, Prince Charles, Prince Andrew, John McDonnell, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tony Blair, ... and that's just the British/European ones that spring to mind, plenty of ghastly Hollywood lefty luvvies I could add to the list, George Clooney, Cher, Michael Sheen, etc.

Yeh! I would be just like those millenials, spend most of my days playing video games. Who knows? If I also spent any spare time looking at Facebook and Twitter, I might get to be as wise and informed about the world as they are!

Once is enough

Apart from adverts, covered a couple of post down, the other things that annoy me on TV are previews and reviews in the news. I can understand that people without the sense to record a program and skip through it may want to see news headlines to decide if they want to watch the whole thing, but do we really need various breaks during the program to tell us, yet again, what's on a bit later? And, even worse, what has already been covered - "Our main news story this evening" Look 'ere! If anyone did not watch the program from the beginning that's their f* problem, don't bore the rest of us!

In real life we get bloody reviews as well. If somebody snuffs it we hear all the details of their life at the funeral, obituaries or in the news, depending on how famous they were. Ah well, at least we don't get previews of their life when they are born. - Yet!


The Warning

A Personal Therapy

Yeh right! Renationalisation is the answer!

John McDonnell, Labour's Second Loony in Command, says Nationalisation will cost taxpayers 'absolutely nothing' although the actual cost would be at least £176billion or ten per cent of the national debt, maybe even as high as £306 billion. Loony 2 says there is no real cost as the government will own the assets. Hmmm. So if I borrow half a million pounds to buy a second house I won't really owe anything? Doubt the mortage company will see it that way and, more to the point, I would still have to greatly cut back on my standard of living to repay the amount. The government certainly won't be able to take over any foreign owned companies for less than their value. Whether they will rip off savers and British pension funds remains to be seen.

As I've said before, I would have preferred that some public sector organisations, like the CEGB, had stayed in public ownership rather than ending up in foreign hands. I was involved with various contracts for the CEGB and, while salaries there were very high, at least they gave the UK some technological independence. In those days we could build and maintain our own power stations without going cap in hand to the Chinese, French or Germans. But just spending vast amounts of taxpayers' money on renationalisation is not miraculously going to restore that independence. The lack of technical prowess in the UK is a much more fundamental problem that involves a whole range of issues like poor education, excessive welfare and an over reliance on cheap imported labour that benefits numerous low value, low tech. businesses that we really don't need. Some of the denationalisation has also worked fine, The Post Office and what is now BT are efficient and profitable British owned industries that compete in the private sector. What would be the point of renationalising those?

There may also be a case for some core companies, in building for example, being in public ownership so that they can deal with normal demands and have the expertise to control larger projects that need to be outsourced. But it makes no sense to bring so much into public ownership that the employees are going to be sitting twiddling their thumbs in between big projects. That is the obvious advantage about the free market economy, we only need to pay for what is actually being done.

The main problem with public ownership is that it is notoriously inefficient because the managers don't have to watch the books closely. Private sector companies have to be careful that they make a profit and can pay back any loans or they will go out of business. In the public sector it matters less because the taxpayer is always there to provide any extra funding. In my previous occupations it was usual to raise the quote of any project for a public sector department because we knew there would be extra costs involved in dealing with unplanned changes due to ill thought out plans. Not to mention ridiculous wastes of money - on one project for a Trident submarine training simulator the main control had to be made of the same very expensive Titanium as the real thing although it made no difference to the training value. In the public sector people are paid more for the same jobs, have index linked pensions, are practically unsackable and there is less connection between ability and salary. Then we have the powerful public sector unions that are going to get even more power if Loony 1 & 2 get their way. Look at those "inefficient" train and tube companies, so many of the problems are caused by all the strikes by ASLEF and the RMT.

The recent collapse of Carillion has fuelled the idiocy of calls for nationalisation. So what would have happened differently if Carillion had been part of a public sector organisation? It is highly unlikely there would have been any greater efficiency or that financial scrutiny would have been better. Sure, it would not have collapsed but the the taxpayer would have just ended up paying more to fill the gulf in the finances!

Soon you'll be an advert

I only tend to listen to the radio when I'm driving or relaxing in my little greenhouse. It's relaxing until the fucking adverts come on anyway! As soon as you hear the word "Next" you know you are going to get 5 minutes of crap about Plusnet, Trust a Trader dot com, Vonage or some other company whose services I am not remotely interested in. You would think a BBC channel would be the solution but the DJs spend so much time drivelling about trivial crap, I'd sooner put up with adverts.

Online adverts are a pain in the arse too. It's fair enough that free services should make money through advertising as long as they are not over intrusive but some ads make the page load slowly and you get annoying popups. Links can be highly dubious too, some of these ad companies are not much better than malware. Hardly surprising people use ad blockers.

One day there may be no escape. It's going to happen that the government will start micro-chipping us from birth so it can monitor our thoughts. I'm sure they won't be able to resist making some money by giving big companies access to our brains.

Enough ranting! Says the moon

Too grumpy! Let's post some nicer crap in the crap that nobody ever reads. Er, nice, what does that mean? Oh yeh, thanks Google. Erm. Ah yes! It's a blue super moon tonight, blue cos it's 2nd full moon in month and super cos' it's at closest approach to earth, so appears bigger. And it's a clear night, so got a good view of it. Just took a photo. Hmmm. Looks much like any other full moon to me and the photo was pretty fuzzy. Using flash didn't seem to help, don't know why.

Let's try again. Ah that's better! A proper super moon. Maybe it will save us from the looming geomagnetic reversal.

Who puts these twits in charge?

Today's total idiot is Britain's Road policing chief who has called for motorists to be penalised for going 1mph over the speed limit!

How F* ludicrous! 1 mph over 70 mph is 1.4%. Does it not occur to him that speedometers, and probably speed cameras, may not be that accurate! This could result in huge numbers of motorists who intended to keep to the speed limit being penalised and, possibly, huge numbers who actually did being penalised as well! Another problem is that most speed indicators are dial types and a quick glance might not be enough to ensure you are observing the limit. Drivers nervously checking their speedometers all the time are likely to have more accidents, not less.

Maybe he thinks we should spend billions upgrading all cars and speed cameras to the required visibility and accuracy and millions more every year doing checks on them. He's probably a Corybn supporter. The magic money tree should be the answer!

And why does he think that a legal limit of x mph is the right balance between safety and the need for drivers to travel and maintain our economy? When the current speed limits were defined, they presumably took account of the necessary allowances to allow for innacuracies in speedometers. He's not just a F* idiot, he's probably got OCD.

Update: A leading lawyer make same points as above. I rest my case m'lud.

A deluded man and the deluded people who support him

A subject that appears in the news a lot these days is homelessness. Hardly surprisingly, fantasist Germy Corbyn plans to solve this problem by providing them all with homes. As usual, they will get lush, publicly-funded properties while low paid people who just manage to support themselves live in poor quality rented properties. More destruction of incentive that will drive the percentage of welfare dependents higher still. If you were a low paid worker who could get a higher standard of living by not working at all, would you bother to keep working? Not sure I would.

Wonderful sounding pledges are easy to make when you're in opposition, when you don't have to worry about what other services will have to be cut to or how much more tax ordinary people will have to find to pay for them. Oh, of course, tax the rich Germy! Trouble is, the wonderful globalism that the leftists embrace pretty much makes that impossible. The rich and the international companies are just going to fuck off elsewhere where they can keep their profits.

Venezuela, here we come. This is the country whose Socialist policies Corbyn is such a fan of, where working class people do not have enough to eat, where human rights are being violated, whose President is accused of purging rivals to consolidate his own power.

This is how every single Communist/extreme socialist regime throughout history has turned out. Wake up Corbyn supporters before it's too late!

The unmentionable cause of so many problems

And why is homelessness rising so much? Here comes that big elephant in the room we are not supposed to mention - immigration!

Statistics show that 52% of rough sleepers in London are foreign citizens. Another fairly recent report, in the lefty Independent, puts the figure even higher, at almost 60%. And is the increase in rough sleeping by British nationals unrelated to immigration, given that it places huge pressures on lower cost rented housing and makes it more expensive? Another report by the lefty Guardian shows there has been a huge increase in the population of London, mostly driven by immigration, that has caused the price of housing to rocket.

It is a PC idiocy that mentioning every real adverse effect of mass immigration is denounced as racism - the shortage of school places is nothing to do with immigration even though English is not the first language in 1 in 9 of them, the increasing congestion on roads and public transport in the UK is nothing to do with immigration even though 14% of the UK population is foreign born . Shortage of housing, pressures on the NHS and prison system, etc. - what a funny coincidence all of these things have become such a problem at exactly the same time as a greatly increased population due to mass migration to the UK!

Many think that the problem will be sorted by leaving the EU but migration from within the EU is actually a lot less than migration from outside it and, frankly, Poles are much more of an asset than those from some Commonealth countries. What we really need is a national government with some grasp of reality that makes British citizens, of whatever ethnicity, their first priority.

News about Fake News is fake

Sure fake news is nothing new. I expect Ug, leader of the Ug trube 50 million years ago, was handing out fake stone carvings accusing his arch rival Ug of all sorts of unsavoury things. Lying in one's own interests is part of human nature.

Actually it's probably not just humans. I daresay scientific research will soon emerge showing that, when bees wiggle their bottoms to guide others in the nest to food, they will deliberately wiggle their bottoms the wrong way so that bees with different political agendas go in the wrong direction.

Look at this research here. Funny how the Labour-supporting bees bees marked with red and the Green Party bees marked with green are going to different places. There are clearly no Tory Bees (marked with blue) in this nest but if there were they would probably go to another different place. Who says political division is a human failing?

What do we do with dead people?

It's incredibly expensive to get buried these days, so few places available. Why is the government so obsessed with building new homes for the living and ignoring this issue? We need some solutions before the "ageing population crisis" becomes a "decaying population crisis". Cremation is hardly environmentally friendly with all the energy it wastes. Lots of people donate their bodies to research or for surgical training but, according to something I read on a forum earlier, (I can't be arsed to check obviously) more are donated than are actually needed and they still have to be disposed of afterwards.

Maybe we should legalise cannibalism. There is a risk of transmitting disease but surely that could be prevented by proper pre-cooking or soaking the corses in chlorine, US style. Maybe we could also make better use of corpses before they go to the butcher by legalising necrophile brothels. All those religious sorts who think sex is sinful could vent their frustrated desires on them instead of kids.

PS Yes I'm in a bad mood! Missed having use of my little van and having to stay in all day!

Virtual world needed ASAP

Got a problem with my little van and the garage can't fix it until Thursday. Not having your own transport is a major problem when you live in an out of the way village with almost bugger all in the way of public transport. Buses from here only go to two towns and only every two hours during most of the day. If I went by bus to a meeting I want to go to tomorrow, I'd have to hang around beforehand for over an hour and a half. To get to something I want to go to on Thursday would take over an hour unless I use a taxi, costing £30-£40 for the round trip. I can see how the old chap next door feels now he's lost his licence. Must be awful being old or disabled in a place like this.

Remote villages are very limiting places even if you know a lot of people in them. There's are some people here who rarely seem to stray outside it and seem content. You see them whenever you go to the village club or pub, whatever the day of the week or time of the day you go, but I don't think I could be content with spending my non-home time drinking and smoking fags in the same place. I like my solitary walks, my walking groups, writer's club, art group, canoing etc. plus meeting my small collection of wierd ladies.

Maybe technology will make things easier. A virtual reality device, like the holodeck in Star Treck, would be great. I could just switch it on and do whatever I wanted, fly to the moon, go deep sea diving, visit the Sidney Opera house etc. etc. without getting out of my chair, Bring it on!

PS In the meantime I will just have to sit around for two days twiddling my thumbs and talking to my little puppet parrot.

Partial recall

Even when we get old, we never totally forget things, all the memories are in there somewhere, it's just retreiving them that is the problem. The process is very hit and miss, sometimes you can't think of a name and another time its just pops into your head.

A topic for the story at my writer's group is Bog Man. Was trying to think of a story based on that title while walking today (something a bit more exciting than a story about a chap cleaning lavatories) and a Mad Magazine item that I'd read decades ago popped into my head, about a creature in a swamp made of mud and rubbish. Think it's the one on this page here from 1973.

Why did they have to stop publishing Mad magazine in the UK? Best silly magazine ever, funnier than Viz which is the nearest you can get in the UK today, even though not as rude.

PS Although it looks as if it's turned into lefty bollux these days with most of the recent stuff attackingTrump. I want good old MM silly crap, not politics of any sort. If it was still published in the UK it would probably be banging on about Brexit.

Racism or reality?

It's a bad idea for a major politician like Trump, assuming he actually did, to use an expression like "shithole nations". It hands the Liberal opposition more ammunition so they can bounce up and down crying "racist" without having to address real issues.

But is it truly a racist expression anyway? It is not a slur on any race as such but a comment on the nature of many third world countries. We should not be in denial of the appalling problems many have with high crime, corruption, dismal economic performance, beliefs that are not in accord with our own core principles and some awful cultural practices that are not in accord with our laws.

It isn't about race as such but the state of development of these nations, you would have found many of these same problems back in Victorian England. If race was the main issue then all African and Carribean nations would be much the same, all South Asian nations would be much the same, all Eastern nations would be be much the same but they are not. In reality there are huge differences between the performances and development of nations with similar ethnic makeup.

In the context of immigration, it is irrefutable that the performance of migrants generally reflect that of the nations and sometimes the places in those nation that they come from. Compare the performances in the UK of those from China with those from the likes of Vietnam, from India with those from Bangladesh, from African nations like Nigeria with those from Somalia.

Forget about calling racism, let's have a little realism. There is nothing that can be less racist than acting impartially on facts and statistics and that is what we should be doing.

A fact that the liberal left never grasp is that it is the very real problems caused by failure to exercise proper controls on immigration that is driving the rise of the far right. If I have to choose between them and the "racists" like Trump I will go for the latter. In the long term it is policies of those like him, people who grasp the realities of human nature and will tackle those real problems, that will reduce real racism.

A Retraction

After liberalising myself with a glass of vodka I have seen the error of my ways, how terribly unfair my last post was to "people with people with health conditions or impairments". Of course disabled people, sorry, people with disabilities, should be able to go to war in any role. They would do us proud. How difficult would it be to provide suitably adapted military facilities? I bet wheelchair access to all of our submarines would only cost a few billions.

Submarine by Björn Hamels Hfodf 11:55, 10 January 2007 (UTC). (Photo shot at SAIL Amsterdam 2005.) [CC BY-SA 2.5 (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.5)], via Wikimedia Commons.

Ta Björn! Couldn't be arsed to draw a cartoon sub!

How much dafter will our society get?

I suppose we should be grateful that the defence secretary has blocked a change to the Army slogan "Be The Best" because it was "dated, elitist and non-inclusive". Only after they has spent over half a million of taxpayers' money though. All for trying to empower disabled, old or other less able people but we would hardly win a war by pretending they are as suitable to be soldiers as fit young men. Let's have a little bit of sense!

More PC lunacy

It seems that the government may be forced to exclude foreign students from official immigration figures. This is quite idiotic as many students will be here for 3 or more years and clearly match the definition of immigrant.

We should not be considering whether or not any particular group of migrants do overstay or what their value is before counting them. The whole point of monitoring is to ensure that we have an accurate assessment of the consequences of immigration. Only when we have accurate figures can we make any proper judgement on overall value, balancing any addition to the GDP against the pressures on our society. Excluding any particular group from the statistics inevitably makes them meaningless. What if there is a big rise in student overstayers? It would not be detected. And, if it is actually true that the majority of students do not overstay, why would anyone be concerned about including them in net migration figures anyway?

The left, and businesses leaders who act solely in their interest of their own company's profits, have no grasp of what facts and statistics are for. They are just out to mislead the rest of us.

PS There's a distinct ratty smelll here. Are the claims that most students return actually true? Past government statistics (no longer online) have stated that up to 51% from some countries overstay for 5 years. Given the big rise in illegal immigration from poorer countries in recent years it would be highly surprising if more people from those same countries, those who are among the lowest performers in the UK, are not using the student route to gain access. We need accurate numbers but, once we have those, it is the quality and usefullness of any overstayers that we need to consider.

Hoorah for Old Bloke

He's still going on his constant walks back and forth to town. This one taken on my only trip to town this past week. Also saw him in town on my only trip there the previous week. Grubbiest cap I've ever seen!

PS It is so unusual to keep seeing the same person over and over I did a Google to see if anyone else locally had spotted him. Nowt reported. Maybe he's a road ghost.

PPS Ah! Maybe it's Tom Cruise. He lives nearby.

Space Aliens

Scientists may have awoken an ‘alien intelligence’ inside asteroid ‘Ouamuamua apparently. Sounds like one of those daft ideas but you can't rule it out.

Given the vast numbers of stars out there, intelligent life is highly probable as there is no reason to suppose there is anything special about our planet. However, the existence of intelligent aliens does not mean that they are likely to be searching our solar system any time soon for rather obvious reasons. Could they really travel vast numbers of light years? There is no evidence that warp speed, as in the Star Trek movies, is actually possible and, if not, could any biological creature survive in space for decades, hundreds or even thousands of years? Would any of them want to even if they could? If all parts of the universe came into being at about the same time, is there any reason to suppose that aliens would be significantly more advanced than us?

If an alien invasion ever does happen, we tend to agree with Stephen Hawking (someone almost as intelligent as we at bloggoth) that it may not be good news. Acting in the interests of one's self and one's own species is how nature works. They may see us as we see rats and wipe us out.

But mankind also has a better side, many people love animals, they try to protect wildlife and pamper their pets like crazy. Who knows? An alien invasion could be great for some of us! We wouldn't have to go to work, we'd get free food and medical care, little treats, get taken for walkies twice a day and spend the rest curled up on the sofa or having our tummies tickled. Bring it on!

Scumbag Police

Damian Green should be sacked for being a liar but he's hardly the only politician to match that description and it isn't as though he lied about anything that is really of great importance to the average citizen. Misleading promises during elections, or false or selective claims about the effects of government policies are things that affect us a lot more.

The more important problem is the actions of those policemen. Confidence in the police is already low for so many reasons, including their recent failures to provide information relating to rape cases. Who the hell is going to trust them if they start revealing information to the press about things that are not illegal or pertinent to an investigation? Especially when it is deliberate and appears to be motivated by malice as in this case.

I doubt it will happen but I would like to see these scumbags stripped of their lavish public sector police pensions and ending up on the streets.


As I'm sure I've said before, BCBATC, coincidences make themselves in our minds, we seize on the few events that appear to be linked and ignore the vastly greater numbers that aren't. Still, must admit that sometimes (usually after a vodka or two) I doubt my own logic.

Just before going on holiday to Malta last week I was watching Tony Robinson's "Hidden Britain by Drone" in which he explored Imber, a village on Salisbury plain that was commandeered by the military during WW2 to serve as a training ground. The villagers were promised they could return when the war was over but they were never allowed back. F* governments! Never trust the bastards! On the first evening in the hotel I was having a look round their little shop and the first paperback I opened at random was Neil Spring's The Hidden Village a creepy ghost novel set in Imber.

BCBATC = But Can't Be Arsed To Check

PS Neil Spring has a recent book called The Watchers. Wondered if he'd plagiarised one of my xoggoth Tales. No "The" darn it, so I can't sue him.

Wierd Perves

The xoggoth obsession with fat ladys' bumoles is a bit pervy but it's almost normal by comparison with some. Manga porn, basically pornographic cartoons, is a favourite with some people, especially the Japanese. Hmmm. Marge Simpson or Lois Griffin are ok I suppose, but not really sure I could get turned on by them. ***Note

Now the distinction between real and Manga porn is getting a bit blurred with news that AI could be used to create whatever sort of porn people want.

Could be interesting I suppose. Soon you will probably be able to buy an 18+ version of the Amazon Echo and say "Sexalexa. Make me an explicit porn film of a giant zombie octupus being shagged by six multi-sexual Brontosauruses". The big plus side of course is that, if all men only become turned on by really wierd stuff like that, it will cause a very welcome reduction in the human population.

***Note: Miss Piggy from the Muppets is a different matter of course. Cor! She is REALLY hot!

Topic: Wierd Perves       Comment here.       Comments so far: 0

YouTube up yer bum

For the two non-existent readers of bloggoth, here's a page with links to xoggoth's favourite YouTube music. Pages get blocked on Youtube for various reasons and you may get a "not available - sorry about that" message. If so, just use the search link. There are nearly always other pages on there with the same song.

Quantum Theory TV Remote needed

Reading news headlines on BBC text service while slurping breakfast this morning as usual. Pity the text doesn't cover the whole screen like the old Ceefax service did and I have to put up with TV crap like the Andrew Marr Show. Gina Miller, who keeps trying to block Brexit, was on this morning.

The Quantum Theory says that we cannot observe things without affecting them. People on TV are being observed by millions so the effect must be much greater. Surely it should be possible to have a kill button on our remotes. If one person is currently on screen and enough people press the button, their head explodes! Great!

Gina Miller, Ken Clarke, Vince Cable, Jean-Claude Juncker... Bang! Bang! Bang! Bang!...

Spending our money

I have always wanted out of the EU whatever the initial economic costs. The main reasons were:

  1. The lack of democracy - never knowing what is going to be inflicted on us next to suit the grand plans of zealots like Juncker and the selfish interests of other nations.
  2. The mass influx of low skilled people who do nothing to increase the wealth of the average UK citizen while driving a huge increase in population that is making the UK a less and less pleasant place to live.
  3. The imposition of laws that are not in the interests of British citizens and tax payers, like those that prevent the removal of foreign terrorists and criminals.

The financial contribution seemed a lesser issue. After a holiday in Malta last week, one of several in recent years to Mediterranean countries, I've changed my mind on that having seen first hand the absurd way that EU funds are lavished on other European nations. In Malta we saw a number of roads, with little traffic compared to the UK, funded by the EU. It was the same in Spain, they have had massive levels of EU investment to build huge new coastal motorways. Now similarly huge amounts are being spent in Eastern Europe.

Why? They are not poverty stricken nations and charitable reasons hardly apply. Some of the places where these magnificant new roads have been built looked better off than some Northern regions of the UK. Even here in the South East, some major roads are in poor condition because the authorities don't have the cash to fix them and pothole damage is commonplace. We also saw EU funded water production facilities in Malta. Roads account for only a part of the money that British taxpayers are handing to other nations. We subsidise trains, research centres, farming, tourism, technology, the list is endless.

There can be a good case for some shared expenditures, to improve tackling of crime and terrorism for example, that will benefit all of us and it is reasonable that nations should contribute according to GDP, but WTF should we be paying for things which, even assuming they are not a waste of money, only benefit other nations and may damage the UK economy by helping them take trade away from us?

Fucking parasitic people

I am getting sick and tired of other people wanting things from me, like relatives who expect me to provide them with websites or do their tax returns or company accounts, hours and hours of work, sometimes days, in return for a bottle of cheap vodka. I never ask anyone for favours, other than minor ones from my son who lives with me, and that's entirely reciprical as I always give him a hand whenever he needs it.

Been spending time with a lady for 2 or 3 years. I am always helping her out with something - fixing things in her flat, picking her up from the airport, moving heavy stuff, going to her aid when she got a puncture, moving furniture in my van, storing large stuff in my house, printing documents off for her, driving her car long distances, the list is endless. Just yesterday she moved again and I took her large wardrobe that has been blocking up my garage for a month, round in my van. I then stayed for a while shifting furniture.

The cow really took the biscuit today. I was out on my walk and got a call from her. She sounded really cold and hostile, asking if I had some screws for the wardrobe door and if so would I bring them round. Said I had but perhaps she could call round as I was busy. She then got all shouty and started accusing me of being unhelpful.

This friendship is one sided in so many ways. If I dare to make plans she always changes them at the last minute and we end up going to the same boring places. If we go somewhere I don't like, I stick with it. If it's somewhere she doesn't like, she wants to call it a day. She is always obsessing about this and that boring me with stuff but never listens when I say anything.

Think that's it! I will go back to online dating and see if I can find a decent woman who doesn't view me (and many others) as her F* servant! Maybe, if we are not spending time together, I can ask out that nice lady at the art group we both go.

Update. She called round, I opened the door and said hello. All I got was "Have you got the screws?" Screw her. If I find someone else maybe I'll get a screw. Not too late. Just.


A Fate Already Sealed

The Autumn Budget

Gin-Clod Junkheap


Brought a Satnav last week. Only tried it once but it seems really good.

I don't think technology like this is used as widely as it should be. Maybe if one could create and save maps of much smaller areas, like a house and garden, it would be really useful for senior citizens who are losing their memory.

PS No I didn't draw her right hand the wrong way round. We never make mistakes. She is suffereing from a rare condition called Senior Hand Reversal.


These days "sexual abuse " seems to include a light touch on the leg. Going by that definition, I've been sexually abused three times in about the last three years.. Oh! The trauma! Calling the police now. Or maybe I should leave it for about 15 years.

Maybe we need to protect people by bringing back chastity belts. And add chastity knee pads, chastity hats, chastity shirts , chastity shoes, chastity gloves ...... etc. You get the picture.

Jimmy Zombie

Got no Trick or Treaters again this year, leaving us with a box of chocolates to scoff. Probably parents tell their kids to stay away from our house because they don't like the look of that creepy old bloke.

Halloween is getting rather boring due to lack of variety in the monsters, the vast majority of people dress up as zombies. With so many corpses wandering around eating brains they have stopped being scary. Yet us creepy old blokes still frighten people. We need to bring back the creep factor and I have a great idea for next year! A Jimmy Saville zombie mask! I think it will be really popular.

You want a grasp of reality at the moment? Ask the "far right"

I don't mean the real far right, the loonies who blame everything on the Jews or think that anyone who can't trace their white British ancestry back at least 300 years is not British, I mean the far right with inverted commas, ie anyone who doesn't live in the PC dream world.

Was watching "The Betrayed Girls" on the sexual abuse of young, vulnerable and mostly white girls in Rochdale by most Pakistani men. There had been reports of this in Rochdale and several other towns for many years but, out of political correctness and fear of being seen as racist, our authorities turned a blind eye to it. Even Labour MP Ann Cryer was called a racist by some when she had the guts to speak out. One would think that these idiots had learned their lessons given that this abuse is now an established fact that has resulted in numerous convictions and has been the subject of a BBC program but no, just a couple of months ago a Labour MP was forced to resign from the front bench for mentioning these realities. The only people shown in the BBC program who had any sense were the EDL protesters.

When will these PC idiots ever grasp that it is they who are fuelling the rise of the real far right in the West by refusing to acknowledge and act on real concerns by denouncing anyone, including Labour MPs, as racist for daring to mention them?

A solution to global warming

Using red button to browse news headlines while munching breakfast as usual.

One article in the science section was a UN warning that we are nowhere near meeting our CO2 emission targets to reduce global warming. Another was about how dinosaurs suffered a catastrophic winter after an asteroid hit the Earth, throwing 300 billion tons of sulphur into the atmosphere. Temperatures were below zero for years.

Surely that's the answer to global warming! Just detonate some nuclear missiles loaded with sulphur in the atmosphere every year to cool us down!


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